More Elated

Nurse Check yesterday was good - my bloodwork was very good - infection fighters where they should be and only 1 thing a little low.  This means that chemo will most probably happen on Monday!  


Side effects-Hands and feet almost always numb from the 2nd knuckle forward and from the arch of my foot forward.  Balance is ok - not normal though.  Mouth sores painful, but not as bad as sometimes!  


I am so happy for the great bloodwork report - and the probability of having my last chemo on Monday!  Perhaps you can imagine...It is like being tied to a large anchor and tugging and twisting and pulling - wanting so badly to be free, and seeing the rope begin to fray -- you know that if you keep working at it you will be free soon!  The adrenaline really revs up and I have to remind myself not to get too excited until it really happens.  


I had a very sobering thought this morning as I drove to bible study and listened to Mandisa's Stronger -- 
This has strengthened me, no doubt.  
but
what is coming next?  
God's goal is to conform us to Christ's likeness -- and
     tough times are one of the tools he can use to do that....
Immediately my mind raced down several fruitless trails thinking it could be this or that.....
   (all awful things - way more awful than colon cancer)
a totally unproductive and disturbing waste of time!  


I had to yank myself firmly back to the present and started thanking God and telling Him that I did trust him - really - and that I would fight my "worry" habit.  
[Todd's grandpa used to say to his wife, ''Momma, you worry too much!" -a sweet memory]


Rather than letting worry rob the present, I am choosing to thank Him for
realizing that I can choose not to worry but to trust
His great gift of Todd and the kids (I can't say boys anymore - I count Gretchen too! :)
plants that grow 2 inches a day!
the funny way robins hunt for worms - cocking their heads and listening
praying with a hurting friend 
sunshine and sixty degrees
gardening friends sharing their wisdom and plants with me :)
seeing a friend carried through a rough time by God's strength
the exuberance of kids playing outside in pretty weather
the encouragement that I get from all of you 
being able to be an encourager in return
God's word reminding me that He is my rock and my fortress --the one I hold on to


Shout for joy to the Lord, all the earth.
  Worship the Lord with gladness
  come before him with joyful songs
Know that the Lord is God
  It is he who made us and we are his;
  we are his people, the sheep of his pasture.
Enter his gates wtih thanksgiving 
  and his courts with praise;
  give thanks to him  and praise his name.
For the Lord is good and his love endures forever;
  his faithfulness continues through all generations!  
        Ps 100


Thanks for checkin in!