Thankful!

Feeling decent!  


I am very thankful to say that I don't feel terrible --  Supposedly the beginning is "easy" so if I felt horrible now, I would be more apprehensive.  There are times when I feel flue-y - the aches and tired - run down. but they come and go.  I felt good enough to go to Bible study this morning, for which I was very thankful!  
When picking a time to do chemo, I had a choice of Mon, Tues or Wed.  They said that I would feel the best the first 24 hours after receiving the chemo, because of the steroids and the anti nausea that comes in the IV.  For this reason, I elected to start Monday, so I would be feeling my best for seeing my friends at Bible Study.  
It is so important to discipline yourself to do the things that are good for you (like getting together with friends) even when you don't feel like it. (like when you feel yucky)
The cancer team grilled my about my "support network" and they were thrilled--evidently y'all mean that I have a much better chance of surviving well  :)    
Speaking of being disciplined, I was very thankful to enjoy a long walk this afternoon in the beautiful sunshine -- relishing what will probably be our last lovely day for this year.  
This helped to chase the aches away for a little bit and the sun always lifts my spirits!  Too bad it is gone by 4:45!   :/


How am I doing?  
If I am totally honest - it is very hard to be a "busy" person, and feel too crumby to get anything done, but not crumby enough to be really sick. 
(Don't get me wrong, I am really glad not to be really sick!)  
My brain is still busy and tells me I should be doing things --and I get spurts where I do get stuff done, but then I will just sit and look at my pile of stuff to do for a long time....The yo yo effect is tough to manage.
I am trying to do this gracefully and "with man this is impossible, but with God, all things are possible"  Matt 19:26 But it is hard.  
I am trying to remember to think on such things - whatever is true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable Phil 4:8 and keep my eyes focused on my God -- Heb 12:2-4
Maybe that is what I am supposed to learn out of all of this.....focus.....


In closing - here is a song that a friend shared
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hy8y6dDzYcE&feature=search-tile
   As I carry this cross, you'll carry me.....


Thanks to all of you!  I appreciate your care!